


The Growing Understanding of Magic

by eli_beeli



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes, Fire Emblem Series
Genre: ;), Also mentioned: The Things They Carried by Tim O'Brien, Greek Mythology - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Kiran also doesnt know how to handle murder which makes sense, Latin, Only mentioned though, Other, Sharena is nosy and v invested in her friends love lives and i love her, also i know kiran is eehh and fonsie is a stuffy prince i love them anyways, anyways yall i cant end a fic in hurt i need that good comfort, bc that also shows up for a few secs, bc that shows up for a sec, but it does end in gays i can confirm, kiran is nonbinary!, let me live, mentioned: nb corrin & anna &odin/owain&ike&soren&felicia&azura&robin&marth&donnell, this begins as kiran meta though just sayin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-12 07:26:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11157087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eli_beeli/pseuds/eli_beeli
Summary: Kiran adjusts to life in Askr just fine and learns how to use weapons. They just have to deal with the repercussions of using said weapons against another human being."Her skin was pale, cold, and turning blue, ohgodsthey hadkilledher! They suddenly remembered a book they read once, back in their world, about the Vietnam War and how the author was still haunted, years later, by the first person he killed, with a bullet through the eye, like a star-shaped hole in his skull. They finally fully understood the depth of that passage now. They wished they had known before."





	The Growing Understanding of Magic

**Author's Note:**

> Y'all just sayin i wrote this for my english class and my teacher didnt even read it like rly my guy i wrote 17 pages double spaces times new roman 12 point font for this and u dont even read it u nerd
> 
> anyways i love these two even though kiran is void of personality in game and alfonse is just "stuffy prince tm" i can dream let me live

Before they were transported into Askr, Kiran always felt a weight in their chest, one that constricted their lungs and churned like the discomfort of dysphoria in their chest. The feeling was constant, building slowly, steadily over the years, and when they began to use a binder, they thought it was better for a while.

Then it returned, the weight holding their lungs in place, making breathing a chore, and the feeling was only ever softened by the weightlessness one feels in water. They always took baths, went to swimming pools as often as possible, to feel that slight relief from the constant heaviness they felt seeping into their bones.

When Anna summoned them to Askr, the weight changed. Their binder fit better, and they could breathe so, so much more clearly, but their hands and skin and hair and face all buzzed, as if just recovering from falling asleep. It confused Kiran until they shot Breidablik for the first time, felt the energy shoot from their fingers, their skin, their hair, their face, leaving their lungs free and open for the first time in their living memory. They laughed with joy as they realized this gentle magic had been festering in them for so long, simply waiting for an outlet they had finally discovered in the form of another world’s call for them. They kept Breidablik close ever since.

They began to test their aptitude for weaponry about a month after they joined the Askran army, and found that while they loved the swift movement of most swords and the brute strength required of axes, they truly fell in love with the feeling of casting magic, the way it quelled some of the buzzing in their limbs. They liked the water-like feeling of using a tome Odin, one of the warriors they had summoned from another far-off land, gifted them after they mentioned their love of water in the marketplace. (They paid him back by engraving the name Aphrodite into it, for the goddess formed from the sea, and by showing him the naming and explaining it, along with its’ “history,” which enraptured him.) Aphrodite was a blue-magic tome, but they had multiple pouches beneath their cloak with two additional tomes, Hermes, a green wind magic tome, and Persephone, a red dark magic tome. They had always adored Greek mythology, and often would tell stories from that time to the troops on camping nights. It was one of the things they prided themself on, bringing up troop morale with the tales of gods from their own far-away land.

Their capacity to use and hold so many magical items astounded many of the magic users they summoned, but they had no proper explanation, besides their near two decades of pent up magic from another world allowing for the range of their use of magic in this world, but that was not a concrete answer to the questions, they knew. What surprised them most about their skills was how impressed the Askran prince was with them. Kiran was confused by his reverence of them, but even when they inquired as to its source, the prince would simply wave off the matter, asking them to spar.

They always won. Aphrodite’s magic was blue, and they could see the faint red magic in the movements Alfonse made with his sword, not unlike the tome Kiran kept on the shelf in their room, called Artemis for its soft light. Their own movements with weapons never gave off the air of magic the way the rest of the army’s did, but Alfonse always outshone the rest, his movements clean, purposeful, filled with more magic than they were near certain he even realized. But despite that magic, blue always beat out red, just as how red always beat out green, and green always beat out blue. Kiran recognized the patterns in the strength of magic here, and yet sometimes they’d let red win the fight against blue, or would switch to Persephone to even the fight out. It always left the buzz in their skin warmer when they did that, which was calming.

They often talked strategy with Alfonse, Sharena, and Anna, but they prefered to spend their down time in the library with their tomes, or with Alfonse. They found themself growing fonder of him each day, but they kept on, hid their feelings as best they could and followed the routine. The routine was safe, and following the routine meant that no one would get hurt for longer than a day, and following the routine meant everyone would be safe, that their heart would be safe-

 

They ran into their first spot of trouble 4 months after they arrived in Askr, which was honestly much, much later than they expected. They had been talking a night stroll around the castle, trying to get fresh air when the Emblian soldier jumped from the trees, trying to cut into their flesh with her axe, so as to render the great, Legendary Summoner unable to assist the Askran cause, possibly through killing them. They reacted like Alfonse, Robin, Marth, Azura, and Soren told them to-

They had killed her instantly, a bolt of dark magic through her throat had done the job, and they scouted the area to ensure that the rogue fighter had been the only threat. Once they determined they were safe from any other danger, they collapsed in front of the body, examining her and her weapon emotionlessly, still in shock. She had no valuables, no keepsakes, no distinguishable features from any of the other soldiers Kiran had seen defeated by their troops, but she was different, somehow. Her hair lacked color and volume, but they felt like the silver locks had some unseen personality in them. Her skin was pale, cold, and turning blue, oh _gods_ they had _killed_ her! They suddenly remembered a book they read once, back in their world, about the Vietnam War and how the author was still haunted, years later, by the first person he killed, with a bullet through the eye, like a star-shaped hole in his skull. They finally fully understood the depth of that passage as they picked up the axe to hold it gently.

It was a silver axe, with a smooth handle that looked like rosewood, but they noticed the initials “B.K.” carved into the wood near the head of the axe. They wondered if those were her initials or those of a friend, a family member, a stranger. They put the axe in its sheathe and searched the body for any hints as to the woman’s identity. They didn’t find any documents but they did find a golden pendant hanging from a copper chain. The pendant showed the Emblian insignia in silver with golden leaves growing from it, forming a tree with copper backing. The back of the pendant bore an inscription reading “Beatrice Kelding: May You Be Safe And Happy.” They scoured her pockets for more, but they found only the necklace and the axe. They wrapped the necklace around their wrist, took the sheathe for the axe and donned it before they ran back into the castle and into their room, sobbing with tears they had held back for near an hour now.

Kiran had killed someone. Someone- no, _Beatrice Kelding_ \- was dead because _Kiran_ had _killed_ her. They muffled their tears in their pillow, sobbing for longer than they could remember, and when they looked up, it was dawn. 

 

Their back hurt from the new weight of an axe, and their cloak had brushes of dried blood. They weren’t sure if they had slept or not, but either way, everything ached. They stood up and removed the sheath, and subsequently the axe, hanging it gently from a hook made for a sword in their wall, stretched, and listened to the quiet clinking of the pendant against the chain. Persephone felt heavier at their waist. They bit their lip before hugging themself tight and chewing on the necklace they had kept from their world, a stim during hard times, like their spinner ring. After a moment of that, they took a deep breath and looked in the mirror. Their face was reflected, looking tired and a little red, but otherwise, Kiran thought they looked normal. They quickly replaced their cloak with one of the two extras Anna had given them in exchange for the 2 batches of cookies they made her, hiding the bloodstained one in the back of their closet. With their tomes at their waist, they left their room, only to promptly run into Sharena.

“Oh! Kiran! I was just about to knock!” she said, and Kiran frowned. She seemed antsy, nervous almost.

“Sharena, what’s wrong?” they asked, and she bit her lip.

“Well, uh, the dawn patrol found a dead Emblian woman on the edge of the forest. We don’t know who killed her, besides that they used some kind of magic to kill her. I just thought you, as our lead tactician and Summoner, needed to know.” Kiran grimaced and nodded, gripping the wrist with the pendant wrapped around it tightly.

“Thank you. I’ll be sure to investigate the matter,” they said, working to keep their voice even. Sharena squinted at them, but nodded.

“Alright. Well, we should go off to breakfast! Food for the soul!” she cheered, dragging the tactician as she went, which they sputtered at. Halfway there, she turned around and looked them in the eyes, as well as she could with the cloak obscuring them. “Hey, Kiran? I want to make sure you remember that you can talk to me, or Alfonse even though he’s a tight-arse, or Anna at any time if you’re having problems, yeah? I mean, like, if you’re ever getting really really homesi-”

“Thanks, Sharena, but I get the feeling I won’t get homesick,” they interjected, grimacing at the memories of compressed magic and emotions and hatred that surrounded their former life. She looked concerned, but simply nodded before continuing to drag Kiran towards the mess hall. When they arrived, Kiran looked around the empty room, sighing.

“Guess it’s earlier than I thought.”

Sharena shrugged before whistling. Mozume jumped out from the kitchen; a new summon who prefered to do domestic tasks as opposed to battle-based one, an idea Kiran wholly respected. (They understood why moreso now than they had when she was first summoned. They remembered Beatrice Kelding’s body, face hair, the charred hole straight through her neck burned into the backs of their eyes, and they knew Mozume must be haunted in the same way by her first kill, as they know she has killed. Kamui told them so when they asked why such a talented fighter refused to fight for the Askran cause. They would talk with her about it in the quiet of their room later, but for now, they just smiled at her.) She waved shyly and walked over, looking up at the two of them.

“D’ya need somethin’? I was jus’ fixin’ up some breakfast fer the army, but it’s good fer now!” She smiled, bowing slightly before Sharena laughed and motioned her up.  
“Aww, Mozu, you should know not to bow for me! I might be a princess, but a princess is nothing compared to an amazing cook!” Mozume laughed slightly at that, smiling at the princess as she waved her hand. Sharena continued. “Anyways, we’re just here for some breakfast.” Mozume smiled.

“I’ll get right on y’all’s breakfast! You’ll be eatin’ in a jiffy!” she said, turning quickly on her heel and jogging into the kitchen, humming a gently lullaby as she went. Sharena sat them down at a table near the door and yawned. Mozume then exited the kitchen, balancing 3 trays in her arms before setting them down gently on the table. She then plopped herself onto the seat across from Kiran gracelessly, smiling at the two of them as she stirred her soup. Kiran forced a smile out of courtesy.

“So, what’re y’all doin’ up so early? I’d ‘magine y’all ain’t real used to bein’ up at the crack a’ dawn like me’n Donnell are,” she asked, before laughing a bit. “Aw, heck, I don’ r’ly like bein’ up this early myself, but habits sure are hard tah break, don’t’cha think?” Kiran hummed, and the conversation continued warmly, but they felt detached.

 

Later, while Kiran sat in the library reading through tactics used by others in previous wars and in different worlds, Alfonse entered the room, looking slightly breathless. Kiran rubbed the necklace on their wrist gently.

“Do you need something, Prince Alfonse?” The man simply hummed, padding across the room calmly, his armor clinking with the movement.

“I came to speak with you about the breach of security last night, Summoner. I assume my sister has informed you of it already?” His words were overly formal, almost… strained? Kiran looked up at him and saw his awkward body language, the way he held himself stiffly, the way he gently bit at his lip. They smiled, patting the seat next to them, and he nodded, taking it.

“I… I have heard, yes.” He sighed.

“I understand you are not omnipotent, but have you any idea where the woman’s belongings went and who killed her?” Kiran tightened their fingers around Persephone, and their other hand pulled into a fist, nails digging into their palms sharply. “Our only lead is that the killer had been a magic user, from the blackened hole in her neck.” Kiran swallowed heavily, and when they opened their mouth to lie, they felt as though they couldn’t move their tongue. Alfonse looked concerned.

“Summoner, are you,.. Alright?” They nodded, taking a quick breath before biting their lip. Alfonse’s eyes were so kind, so honest, and Kiran couldn’t bring themself to lie.  
They unwrapped the pendant from their wrist, putting it gently on the table. His eyes narrowed in confusion. They pushed it towards him, the insignia pressed against the table.. He turned it around, taking a sharp breath. Kiran smiled in a broken manner at him, and he cursed softly.

“Wait, Ki-Kiran, did you-!?” They felt tears coming on again.

“Please, please Alfonse, don’t hate me. I-it was- I-I just-!” They covered their face. “She-she tried to k-kill me, and I... I just…” They let out a small bubble of magic, making a faux wind to blow Alfonse’s hair around. They didn’t want to look him in the eyes for fear of anger looking back at them. Their breath was too fast, they knew that, but they couldn’t _do_ anything, and so they just bit into their tongue, waiting for him to hit them-

They felt warm.There was a pressure around them- wait. Was he… hugging them? They heard him make a shushing noise.

“Gods, Kiran, I’m… I’m so sorry, the first is always the hardest. We… We should have warned you-” They took their hands from their face, maneuvering them around him before they put their face in his shoulder and _sobbed_.

“Alfonse, I…” He shushed them gently, holding them tight. It reminded them that they were still alive.

“I know. She’ll never really leave. I wish I could tell you she would, but she won’t. Mine hasn’t left. She’s still haunting me, but it gets easier. The guilt stops eating you alive eventually, that I promise you.” They nodded into his shoulder, trying to ignore the taste of blood in their mouth from their tongue. Once their tears slowed enough to allow for speech, they looked up at him, face a mess, cloak hood having long since been pushed back so he could run his hands through their hair to comfort them.

“A-Alfonse… Can you help me b-bury her? I have her a-axe and her locket… She deserves a proper funeral…” He shook his head.

“We will send her and her belongings back to Emblia, so she may lie with her ancestors, so her family may say goodbye. It that alright?” Kiran slowly nodded before putting their face back into his shoulder.

“I… Thank y-you, Alfonse. I, well, I n-needed reassurance and an out-outlet for all these emotions… Thank you.” He hummed softly, rubbing gentle circles on their back.

“Truly, Kiran, it was nothing. If you have any other issues, or questions, or simply wish to talk, my door is always open to you.” They made a noise of affirmation, slowly letting him go.

“Prince Alfonse, if I may…” they spoke, levelling their voice as they rubbed their face to remove the remainers of their tears. He nodded, straightening his posture.

“Yes?”

“Please, call me Kiran. Summoner is too professional, especially now that I’ve sobbed into your shoulder for gods alone know how long.” The prince’s cheeks pinkened slightly, but he nodded.

“I.. Of course, Kiran.” They smiled. “But in exchange, I must ask you remove the epithets you commonly use with me. If I cannot call you Summoner, you should not call me Prince.” Kiran blinked before laughing a touch and nodding.

“Yes, yes, of course! Sorry, Alfonse! I also hope you know you can talk to me about anything you want as well, although I’m sure I won’t be as much help as you are. what with my lack of experience, and all.” When they looked at him again, his face was more pink than before, but they attributed that to lighting, as the sun was setting, tinting the room red and pink. They couldn’t hope for more now, not after that display.

“I.. Y-yes, yes, of course…” Alfonse smiled, albeit somewhat awkwardly, before standing. “Well then, I must be off! I promised Mozume I would assist her in the kitchen tonight, for although I am a prince, I must learn cooking as a simple member of an army!” he said quickly, before turning and walking towards the door.

“Bye, Alfonse! And thank you!” they called behind him, waving. He waved back quickly before exiting the room, giving them one last smile on the way. They felt their heart stutter in their chest at that, but they forced it down, not wanting to ruin this wondrous friendship with the standoffish prince. Their stupid heart came second, so they got back to their research instead, trying to lose themself in the books to quell the guilt that was growing again in their chest.

 

Three months had passed since they killed her, and they found the guilt slowly lessening, as Alfonse had said it would. It still hurt, but she was less involved in Kiran’s every action. Meanwhile, they had held many talks with Alfonse as to their emotions, questions, and simply just to talk during those three months, as had he with them. They felt they knew him better as Alfonse, not just the Prince of Askr, and it scared them how warm and safe they felt around him, how much their heart yearned for him. Some nights they cried themself to sleep with wanting and wishing for him, and that sheer closeness and dependence scared them. But they couldn’t back away from him now. Their little, too human heart would burst, and they feared he would think himself guilty of hurting them, which he could never do, not for long enough to warrant them staying away. So they kept on, talking, laughing, blushing, fighting, and simply being with him. But as their feelings grew more intense, they found themself scared of the growing possibility of him finding out, so they cut him off some, avoiding him whenever possible.

 

Then, Sharena pulled them aside one day, smiling coyly as she brought them into her room, much to their confusion.

“Sharena, I understand wanting to talk, but do we really need to do it in your room?” they asked, growing uncomfortable in the intimate location, and she grinned and nodded.

“Yep! I don’t want Alfonse to hear anything I’m ‘bout to say, otherwise you may just about lose it!” she offered cheerfully. Kiran looked at her warily.

“Why?”

“Well, I wanted to talk to you about your crush!” she began plainly, leaning in so as to catch any hints of a blush. Kiran felt their face warm.

“Wh-what crush, Sharena? I- I can assure you I truly don’t have one! Where might you have gathered such rumor-mill type information? I-I am sure to help quell the source-” Sharena broke out laughing.

“Holy shit. It’s worse than I thought! You only talk like a super cool royal when you’re _super_ flustered! You’ve got it _bad_ for him, Kiran-” Kiran made a high pitched whining sound as they put their head in their hands.

“Uhhgg, how did you… I mean, I thought…” they started, and Sharena simply laughed again before tapping their nose gently.

“You were really obvious, Kiran. Plus, I read your diary!” They narrowed their eyes in confusion.

“I don’t have a diary, Sharena.” She grinned.

“Ok, you don’t, but you like to annotate books a lot. So when I looked through a strategy book you borrowed recently, I noticed a diary entry on the back pages that were blank and recognized your note taking handwriting!” They cussed softly before slumping against the wall. “Plus, you kinda hang with my brother a _lot_ , and are always blushing around him, so it’s not like it was hard to notice,” she explained, shrugging. They let out another sigh.

“Gods, I thought I tore that out…” they whined, and Sharena simply sat down next to them.

“It’s alright, Kiran, and don’t worry, I plan on helping you confess since you’re so desperately hopeless on your own!” Kiran sputtered indignantly.

“What!? I’m not hopeless! Also! I’m fine wallowing in my feelings on my own in peace so as to maintain my amazing, super awesome friendship with Alfonse!” they argued, and Sharena sighed, placing her hand on their back. A voice at the back of their head whispered that they didn’t deserve something amazing like him after what they did to her. They agreed.

“I’ve seen the way you look at him when you think no one’s looking, Kiran. Wallowing in your feelings will get you nowhere good. You’ll probably get so bad you’ll have to leave to “fix it” for both of you and end up making it worse, yah?” Kiran groaned while Sharena laughed. “I’ll take that to mean that I’m right. But, Kiran, I have to be honest with you,” she began, words dipping towards a serious tone. Kiran bit their lip as they looked up at her.

“You really should confess, before one or both of you gets seriously hurt later- Aah-aah! Before you try and refute me, hear me out, ‘kay? You’ve got it _really_ bad for my brother, which I totally get. He’s a sweet guy! But, you’ve been cutting yourself off from him, so you can, like, avoid your feelings, and that makes him nervous that he somehow made you angry.”

“But I-” The voice in their head was getting louder, sounding more like a shrieking bird crying “No, you don’t deserve happiness! No!” The voice was almost overpowering, but Sharena was just barely louder.

“No buts, Kiran! I’m just telling it like it is. Even if you didn’t mean to hurt him, you’ve hurt him. Now,” she continued, placing a hand on their shoulder. The voice of what they imagined Beatrice would sound like quieted. “You have to know that you’re his best friend, Kiran. You know him just about as well as I do, and I had an 18 year head start! So, I want you to confess. Fonsie isn’t really the type to stop being friends with a guy just because they have a crush on him!” She tightened her hold around their shoulder gently. “So, please, Kiran. Just tell him how you feel, even if it’s really hard, and scary, and to help…” Sharena looked around, eyes narrowed as she exaggerated her look for any onlookers. She made a sound of approval at the vacancy of the room before leaning into Kiran’s ear to whisper dramatically. “I have conclusive evidence that Fonsie is _super_ pan.” Kiran shot back at that, feeling their face flush again as they continued to bite their lip. Beatrice was silent in their mind.

“Wh-what?!” Sharena broke out laughing as she watched Kiran’s reaction, much to their displeasure.

“H-holy shit! I- phft- I wasn’t expecting _that_ reaction!” She continued laughing for a moment before calming down, wiping at her eyes a bit. “But yeah, Fonsie used to crush on Soren, Felicia, and Ike when he was younger! I mean, he probably still thinks they’re cute and all, or really hot in Ike’s case, but he’s obviously not as enamoured with them as he used to be,” she explained. Kiran narrowed their eyes, and she smiled gently. “Before you ask, I’m absolutely positive, Knight’s Honor.” She then slipped over to her desk and produced a small journal. “Here’s his diary from that time, you you really wanna be sure for yourself! It was hidden in the room behind the third bookshelf to the right, so it’s not like he didn’t know I could find it!”

“...There’s a room behind that bookshelf?” they asked incredulously, and Sharena shrugged.

“Yeah. It was made as a study for the first Askran Queen away from her advisors. All the royals know about it. Plus any heroes who happened to find it. And now you!” She grinned before handing over the journal. “If you don’t want to check, you can just put it back there.” Kiran nodded and made for the door to leave the room.

“Hey, Kiran?” They stopped, hand on the doorknob. “Even if my idiot brother doesn’t like you like that, don’t worry about it. Everyone here adores you for who you are, and if Fonsie is a jerk about turning you down I’ll wipe the floor with him, ‘kay?” Kiran smiled and opened the door.

“Thanks, Sharena.”

 

When they arrived in the library, they began to look for the bookshelf. When they found it on the right wall, they began to feel for a switch or trigger to allow them into the room Sharena spoke of. They smiled when they saw a book titled “Aperi Ianuam- Lecta” and mentally thanked their past self for learning basic Latin to help in English classes.

“Aperi ianuam,” they whispered, and a small bubble appeared, through which they could see a small room. They smiled and walked through, hearing the bubble pop behind them. As they entered, they noticed already lit torches which allowed them to see a comfy room with simple furnishings, including a blue-haired prince sitting on the couch, reading a book by firelight. They felt their shoulders tighten at the sight of him, their cheeks grow warm, but they continued towards him, holding the book tight to their chest.

“Oh, Sharena, I don’t see you in here often,” Alfonse said, not bothering to look up from his book. Kiran smiled.

“Well, I’d suppose that makes sense as I’m not Sharena.” Alfonse seemed to jump up in his seat at the sound of their voice, looking over to them in shock, his features warmer in the firelight.

“K-Kiran! What are you d-doing here?!” he asked, slamming his book shut as he grew tense. They sighed, sitting on the couch across from him.

“Sharena told me where to find this place, and I found this book earlier in the library. She told me I might find it’s proper location here,” they lied, placing the book gently on the table. Alfonse visibly grew red.

“Wh-what!? D-did you read it?!” he asked sharply, voice almost squeaking as he drew it into his arms, checking to be sure nothing had happened to it. They smiled, holding in their laughter at his cute expression.

“I didn’t read it, no. It seemed personal, and I wouldn’t want to invade the privacy of someone who I care about.” Alfonse bit his lip. They hugged themself, looking away while their heart sped up uncomfortably in their chest. “I… Please, Alfonse, hear me out. I, well, I have told you about my gender, and how I, well, am not a boy or a girl, yeah?” The prince nodded, looking confused and concerned. They felt a ball forming in their throat.

“I also… Well, I… I like anyone, no matter their gender too…” They let out a sigh of relief that they had forced that out of their stubborn throat even with their tongue getting heavier each second. But they still had much more to go with a stone tongue. Alfonse seemed to have stopped breathing. “And I… Well… I don’t hate you, that’s not why I’ve been avoiding you lately, which is really terrible of me to do because it hurts you and I don’t mean to hurt you, ever, please forgive me, but anyways I-... I don’t think I can say this, maybe I should just-”

“Kiran,” he began slowly, cutting them off. “Please, tell me. I forgive you, but I need to hear what you came here to say.” They took a deep breath.

“Please, Alfonse, forgive me for having, well, fallen in love with you,” they said, voice soft while they tightened their arms around themself, digging their fingers into their sides. They closed their eyes so they couldn’t see his face.

“I… Kiran…” He probably hated them, gods, they ruined _everything_ , they should have just stayed quiet and let Beatrice be right to begin with- “Kiran, I can’t even begin to tell you how-” They bit their lip and wanted to cry. They opened their eyes and looked up, their arms falling beside them gently. Alfonse was holding their hands, smiling wide, with small tears in his eyes. They bit their lip harder.

“Kiran,” he began again, his smile almost too soft for them to bear. “I can’t even begin to tell you how happy you’ve made me in saying my feelings _are_ requited.” They froze, a chill running up their spine before dispersing by their shoulders, the pinpricks of electricity scattering like grains of sand. They stared at him, wide eyed as their body flared with a soft warmth. He let go of one of their hands, raising it to rest gently against their cheek. Alfonse smiled softly, and Kiran felt their cheeks flush even as they leaned into his touch slightly. “I know my confession is incredibly…” He smiled awkwardly. “Formal, but it’s what I revert to when I am too flabbergasted to think straight.” Kiran laughed slightly, the voice of Beatrice in their mind going silent for once. Alfonse smiled wider and leaned down, pressing his forehead against their’s. Beatrice piped up that he was lying, that this was just to hurt them more in just a moment. They gently brushed her comments off, holding his hand tighter.

“Kiran, this is…” He trailed off, but his tone conveyed the soft feeling well enough. They smiled. “Can I…” he trailed off again before looking them in the eye. “Can I kiss you…?” Kiran inhaled sharply before whispering.

“Yes.” He grinned smiled, looking like the stars on a clear night before they closed their eyes and leaned in. They silenced Beatrice’s screeching in their mind and leaned in, living for the warmth it made in their chest and the way it calmed their thoughts. They pushed their grief away and let themself live again, truly, for the first time in the months. They would live through this and be ok, they realized as they slowly drew away from the prince. His smile only confirmed that. They smiled back, the truest smile they'd had in months.

They would _survive_ , and they would live happily. That they knew for sure, as long as they had Alfonse. They would _live_.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope y'all liked that!! you can find me on tumblr @eli-the-aro is you wanna throw some of them good hcs at me about these two


End file.
